I think with only a few exceptions ALL the rainbow cichlids in this club came from me. Matt, Jon, Tony, turfboss, Jesse, etc. So, yeah, a lot of experience!
Yes, I had a 40 breeder and I felt two pairs did not thrive in it. They survived in that no one was killed, but the subdom pair was pretty miserable, getting pushed into the corner even when I "gave" each pair a lovely little den of their own.
As far as eating fry or no, most of my pairs were very good parents. But I also have some weirdness. One pair apparently didn't really lke each other very much and in one case they split the fry and each guarded them in different ends of the tank. In another case, the mom took the fry away from the dad entirely, who did snatch them whenever he could. In other cases, both parents were exemplary parents, even guarding them when the "swarm" got fairly small, at which time most parents will abandon them.
I also had males switch partners, so the bonded for life thing ain't true.
Just passing on my personal experience.