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Who's a fish 'geek'?

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Plenipotentiary-at-large
Be it a perceived badge of honor or blight or one's personal pedigree, the attribution or imagined perception of self as a 'geek' bears consideration.

Thus far I have rejected the label whence it has been offered. Fact is that although I have 30 tanks (running), half of them are 10 gallon breeders and only 5 of rest are 40+ gallons (See? Am getting defensive already). I like my tanks, they keep me off the streets and largely out of trouble (more's the pity). That being said, to qualify as a 'fish geek' (and perhaps to insulate myself from some imagined personal slide into the realm of functional and cosmic irrelevance) I have assembled a list of behaviors and actualities that in my estimation would in sufficient abundance and practice certifiably qualify one as a 'fish geek'. Forthwith:

1) Uses CO2 injection;
2) Runs UV sterilizers;
3) Spends more than 15 minutes a week testing water chemistry;
4) Keeps live food cultures in the kitchen/family refrigerator;
5) Subscribes to that awful advertising vehicle masquerading as a hobbyist magazine that came in the ACA swag bags;
6) Maintains membership in more than 3 fish clubs;
7) Has fish related bumper stickers/decals on vehicle;
8) Thinks Mo Devlin is the Second Coming;
9) Spends more on fish/fish stuff each month than on utilities;
10) Freezes deceased fish in the expectation of having them analyzed to determine cause of death;
11) Does water changes more often than brushing one's teeth;
12) Has already scoped out travel routes and lodgings for next year's ACA;
13) Sets internet browsers so that they automatically open to CCA or other fish website;
14) Obsesses over things like vivipary, con-specificity and especially biowheels;
15) Finds pike or peacocks arousing;
16) Upon reflection realizes that live feedings are consistently the high point of the day;
17) Mentally assesses/redecorates other people's homes when visiting to determine possibilities for installing fish tanks;
18) Has the last name of Kelly and goes by Pat;
19) Maintains more than 719 gallons of total tank volume;
20) Equates the size of one's Mbuna with a corresponding measure of manliness.

While this is only a partial list, I am quite confident that others will do their part to make it more definitive, and in truth am almost gleefully expectant.
 

chriscoli

Administrator
I'm laughing so hard I'm in tears!

I think you'd have to add one about "Has argued defensively about the heath and well-being of one's sponge filters"

Any idea what the minimum number of "yes" answers one must have to be considered a "fish geek"?
 

Andrewtfw

Global Moderators
If you actively work to list criteria defining a person as a "fish geek", all the while trying to make sure said criteria does not result in self-identification as said "geek" you, my friend are most certainly a fish geek. :lol:
 

mchambers

Former CCA member
Add "While at the hardware store and sometimes even the grocery store, you are mostly focused on things you can use with your aquariums and fish."
 

Pat Kelly

CCA Member
Staff member
18) Has the last name of Kelly and goes by Pat

? Who is this?
I want to meet him.
sounds like a nice guy.
 

fischfan13

Banned


1) Uses CO2 injection;
Plants??? Pfffft.

2) Runs UV sterilizers;
What are water changes for?

3) Spends more than 15 minutes a week testing water chemistry;
Does my finger in the tank to check temp count?

4) Keeps live food cultures in the kitchen/family refrigerator;
Have you seen the size of me? Do you think I share my fridge?

5) Subscribes to that awful advertising vehicle masquerading as a hobbyist magazine that came in the ACA swag bags;
Me? Subscribe to a Magazine?

6) Maintains membership in more than 3 fish clubs;
I'm popular...what can I say. :)

7) Has fish related bumper stickers/decals on vehicle;
I don't have a bumper sticker of Padma on any of my cars, what makes you think I would have one that is fish related?

8) Thinks Mo Devlin is the Second Coming;
Only if he can make me a Puttanesca!

9) Spends more on fish/fish stuff each month than on utilities;
Electric company, what's that?

10) Freezes deceased fish in the expectation of having them analyzed to determine cause of death;
The only thing that I freeze for further analysis is leftover pizza.

11) Does water changes more often than brushing one's teeth;
No wonder why my mouth tastes like Tropheus water.

12) Has already scoped out travel routes and lodgings for next year's ACA;
I have a pre-paid AAA card paid up to 2016 just to get 10% off of these rooms

13) Sets internet browsers so that they automatically open to CCA or other fish website;
You even have to ask???

14) Obsesses over things like vivipary, con-specificity and especially biowheels;
NO. NLS, HBH and Omega One.

15) Finds pike or peacocks arousing;
Arousing? If dished correctly.

16) Upon reflection realizes that live feedings are consistently the high point of the day;
Any feeding is a high point to me.

17) Mentally assesses/redecorates other people's homes when visiting to determine possibilities for installing fish tanks;
Sorry, I usually go to see if that person has a channel that carries the Mets.

18) Has the last name of Kelly and goes by Pat;
Since Pat has changed his name I guess "Pat Kelly" is up for grabs

19) Maintains more than 719 gallons of total tank volume;
Have to hold the Sam Adams somewhere

20) Equates the size of one's Mbuna with a corresponding measure of manliness.
I keep dwarf Mbuna:D

 

Avatar

Plenipotentiary-at-large
Keep my biowheel off your list!

Signed,
Fish Geekette

I make no assumptions pertaining to your biowheel and as a gentleman always (mostly) observe proper decorum. So be nice or I'll start in about what you can do with your power heads..
 

Buckcich

Members
These post goes right into my favorites :rolleyes:. Geek bashing should be illegal, but.................................it sure is fun to watch!!
 

YSS

Members
Very funny, Sam! Unfortunately, I am not a fish geek. I guess I will have to work harder to be one. :)
 
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